#Function-Oriented Tags:

[alchemiclee]

I still don't understand how instagram works fhdnhdnse I was told by multiple people that it's easy and useful and and good I should post my art and stuff there but I never figured out how it works and it's been useless to me lmao I ALSO CANT STAND HOW IT CROPS PHOTOS (my number one complaint)

[gray-gray-gray-gray]

Let's Talk About The Overlap Between Autism, ADHD, and Schizophrenia

I've been wanting to make a graph like this for awhile, about the overlap between these three disorders. Tagging @auschizm because it's highly related to that blog :D

Text transcribed below the cut because it's long!

Title: Can We Talk About The Overlap Between... AUTISM, ADHD, AND SCHIZOPHRENIA?

Description: You always hear people talking about AuDHD, but schizophrenia has the same if not more overlap with these disorders, and it's not talked about!

Let's start boosting schizophrenic people's voices. There's more to the disorder than just psychosis!

Graph based on my personal experience with schizophrenia, my experiences with autistic and ADHD communities, and the words of people with AuDHD themselves.

Made by @gray-gray-gray-gray on tumblr.

Schizophrenia Only

Typical age of onset between 15 and 54 years old

Before the onset/ first psychotic break, there is a "prodrome" where you have a drop in functioning

Reoccuring episodes of psychosis (Hallucinations, delusions, paranoia, etc)

Likely had less noticeable or covert symptoms pre-onset

Often daydreaming, 'in their own world', hyper-self-reflective, 'space cadet'

Autism Only

Need for familiarty & routine

Sudden disruptions to routine are highly distressing

ADHD Only

Craves new experiences & novelty

Autism & ADHD (AuDHD)

Interest-based nervous system (meaning attention & focus is activated based on personal interest, not how important something is)

Onset in very early childhood -- before age 12

Autism & Schizophrenia (Auschizm)

Self-soothing via repetitive behavior

Higher rates of catatonic symptoms

Social withdrawal or exclusion

Difficulties filtering speech

Flat affect

Alogia

Concrete and/or literal thinking

Higher rates of personality disorders, dissociative disorders, and trauma

Internally oriented behavior

Difficulties wording what they

want to say correctly & disorganized speech

Difficulties with insight into what is part of the disorder and what is neurotypial

ADHD & Schizophrenia (SchizoDHD)

Impulsivity & hard to sit still

Difficulties regulating attention & focus, also causing social cue difficulties

Difficulty keeping a daily routine

Jumping around or out of sequence speech

Forgetfulness

Failing to reach a clear end goal or point in speech

Less coherent progression from start to finish in stories

General difficulties with thinking clearly

Drawing blanks / losing train of thought often

Difficulties finding motivation to do things

Lots of energy some days, no energy other days

Troubles multitasking

Planning poorly or not at all

All Three

Stimming

Echolalia, echopraxia

Executive dysfunction

Sensory issues & overload

Emotional dysregulation

Interconnected/webbed thought

ND communication (infodumping, connecting ideas, shared interest bonding)

Increased risk of victimization

Hyperfixations

Higher rates of depression, anxiety, OCD, BFRBS, bipolar, suicidality, sleep issues, eating disorders, and substance abuse

Eye contact differences

Difficulties switching tasks

Masking

Hyperfocusing

Restlessness

Prone to boredom

Memory issues

Social situation difficulties

Time blindness

Difficulties with school, learning, and following tasks

Chronic disorder

RSD

Anhedonia

Alexithymia

Interoceptive difficulties

[roksik-dnd]

For everyone who asked: a dialogue parser for BG3 alongside with the parsed dialogue for the newest patch. The parser is not mine, but its creator a) is amazing, b) wished to stay anonymous, and c) uploaded the parser to github - any future versions will be uploaded there first!

UPD: The parser was updated!! Now all the lines are parsed, AND there are new features like audio and dialogue tree visualisation. See below!

Patch 7 dialogue is uploaded!

If you don't want to touch the parser and just want the dialogues, make sure to download the whole "BG3 ... (1.6)" folder and keep the "styles" folder within: it is needed for the html files functionality (hide/show certain types of information as per the menu at the top, jumps when you click on [jump], color for better readability, etc). See the image below for what it should look like. The formatting was borrowed from TORcommunity with their blessing.

If you want to run the parser yourself instead of downloading my parsed files, it's easy:

run bg3dialogreader.exe, OPEN any .pak file inside of your game's '\steamapps\common\Baldurs Gate 3\Data' folder,

select your language

press ‘LOAD’, it'll create a database file with all the tags, flags, etc.

Once that is done, press ‘EXPORT all dialogs to html’, and give it a minute or two to finish.

Find the parser dialogue in ‘Dialogs’ folder. If you move the folder elsewhere, move the ‘styles’ folder as well! It contains the styles you need for the color coding and functionality to keep working!

New features:

Once you've created the database (after step three above), you can also preview the dialogue trees inside of the parser and extract only what you need:

You can also listen to the correspinding audio files by clicking the line in the right window. But to do that, as the parser tells you, you need to download and put the filed from vgmstream-win64.zip inside of the parser's main folder (restart the parser after).

You can CONVERT the bg3 dialogue to the format that the Divinity Original Sin 2's Editor understands. That way, you can view the dialogues as trees! Unlike the html files, the trees don't show ALL the relevant information, but it's much easier to orient yourself in.

To get that, you DO need to have bought and installed Larian's previous game, Divinity Original Sin 2. It comes with a tool called 'The Divinity Engine 2'. Here you can read about how to unstall and lauch it. Once you have it, you need to load/create a project. We're trying to get to the point where the tool allows you to open the Dialog Editor. Then you can Open any bg3 dialogue file you want. And in case you want it, here's an in-depth Dialog Editor tutorial. But if you simply want to know how to open the Editor, here's the gist:

Update: In order to see the names of the speakers (up to ten), you can put the _merged.lsf file inside of the "\Divinity Original Sin 2\DefEd\Data\Public\[your project's name here]\RootTemplates\_merged.lsf" file path.

Feel free to ask if you have any questions! Please let me know if you modify the parser, I'd be curious to know what you added, and will possibly add it to the google drive.

[smuttysabina]

"I am" a Bitch

(Rei x Male Reader, 3.3k Words) Tags: Pretty Little Risky Baddie, What A Brat, Wow She Is So Spoiled, I Sure Hope She Doesn't Get Her Butt Stretched Out, Anal Sex, Brat Taming, Lots Of Complaining, Rough Sex, Too Much Teasing, Chaebol Obliteration

Rei is a spoiled brat. Like most of IVE, she had been pampered until her pretentiousness had swollen to absurd heights; her every whim was to be fulfilled without worry of the consequences. She fully expected that her demands would be followed, especially those pertaining to the bedroom. Though Rei was not the worst of the bunch, her sexual appetites were still incredibly skewed in her favor; the pleasure of her partner was very much so beneath her notice. So she was rather unforgiving when her "lover" failed to satisfy her obnoxious orders, but not in an enjoyable way. Perhaps you should have known better, but truly, who could blame you for dumping the fattest load of your life balls-deep inside of Rae's precious asshole?

You had mostly known what you were getting into when you applied to work for IVE, every Kpop group had its own distinct quirks regarding the hired help. Itzy were renowned for their rapacity when dealing with the "interns", and their older sisters of Twice were famous for their fetishistic forced-breeding schedules. Le Sserafim were a popular choice, mostly due to their extremely laid-back and open attitude towards sex. Positions at Blackpink were the most sought after of course, though they remained permanently open, their turnover rate was less than a week. And IVE... well IVE were notorious for treating their employees like utter garbage. Which was hardly unusual if truth be told, except for the fact that this mindset extended to include most of the staff, not just the sex pets. It was by unwritten agreement amongst idols that the more integral staff members were to be left unravished; after all, it is difficult for a music company to function when their song writers are too busy pumping the idols full of cum all day to write anything. Most importantly however, the cleaning staff were to be left entirely unmolested; if not for those brave souls, the number of injuries caused by slipping in puddles of sex-fluids would skyrocket. Even that insatiable goddess Jennie, who would fuck almost anything with a pulse, would greet the janitors with a bemused smile before continuing to drain whatever meat-dildo she was currently sending to heaven.

Unfortunately, IVE had no such distinctions; if Gaeul wanted to have the producers lick her pussy all day, then that's what they did. It was a dark miracle that the group managed to continue putting out comebacks, let alone the sort that would be astoundingly popular. So to say that the atmosphere at the IVE mansion was a bit stressful would be an understatement. But all of that negativity was on the back of your mind when you showed up for orientation at the mansion; your adoration for IVE drowning out any concerns you may have felt reading up about them. Led through a tastelessly expensive entry hall, you and many other new hires were ushered into a drab side-room for your training. After only a perfunctory introduction though, you were seamlessly sorted into being an assistant for one of the girls; and sent on your way. You are directed to a large, stately bedroom, its footprint greater than most people's entire homes, its door embossed with its owner's name. The debris of an artist occupies an entire corner of the vast room, painting materials stashed haphazardly alongside expensive electronic drawing devices. The bathroom fills the rest of that half of the room, an opaque wall covering what looks to be a standing shower as well as a sizable hot tub. The sleeping area is conjoined with the living area, cluttered with clothes, books, and entertainment devices; with an enormous television planted in front of a deep couch. The bed is sturdy, dowered with an expensive mattress and covered with an eclectic collection of blankets; and laying upon it is the owner of this gilded cage: Rei.

The idol rests upon her stomach, delicate feet kicking in the air above her head, perusing her phone with every appearance of absolute boredom. She gives you unhappy glare as you approach, her heavily-lidded eyes showing you nothing but contempt as she takes in the details. Rei lets out a petulant sigh, "So you're my new assistant huh, why do I never get the cute ones? Whatever, drop your pants, let's see what we're working with here." You hesitate at this bizarre and sudden demand, only complying after she irritable motions for you to proceed, "Hmmph, I guess you'll do, at least you don't have a needle dick. Please tell me you aren't one of those premature guys, I swear most boys have zero endurance. What? Put that thing away, I'm tired of looking at it already!" Blushing furiously from Rei's barbs, you haul your pants back up and wait for further instructions. After several minutes of pointedly ignoring you, she finally deigns to glance back up in exasperation, "Well don't just stand there idiot, do something useful like... cleaning or something? This place is a mess!" Which, to be fair, it absolutely was. Clothes were strewn about haphazardly, towers of empty food cartons were everywhere, all manner of trash was scattered about, and sticky stains on the carpet were more common than clean portions.

So you get to work, while Rei lounges about on her bed, yelling dubious advice and shrill instructions at you while you labor. Her phone either blares annoying videos, except when she is video-chatting with her fellow idols; in which case she yammers away just as loudly as the bitches getting railed in the call. And of course, she masturbates constantly, her fingers squelching away beneath her sweatpants as she watches her friends engaging in all sorts of sexual activities. That or porn; and if you are honest with yourself it's difficult to tell the difference between the two. Not that Rei takes kindly to be watched during her "Private Time", nor the fact that the sight and scent of her pleasuring herself has an arousing effect on your own genitals, "You fucking pervert, stop watching me! Ugh what kind of assistant are you? And are you getting hard again? Stop that! I didn't say you could get horny, so stop looking and keep cleaning!" An attitude which was annoying in the extreme, especially since it was a touch difficult to bend over with a hardon bulging out of your pants. Your irritation only grows as Rei continues to rain abuse on you for doing what you're told, particularly when she went into hysterics when you got around to picking up and sorting the massive pile of underwear heaped against a dresser. You are starting to see why IVE had be having trouble retaining their staff...

After several grueling hours of labor, you finally finished restoring order to at least one portion of Rei's expansive living area; and so lay down to take a break on a couch. Not five minutes had passed before you were being poked awake by Rei, scowling down at you with her hands on her hips. Who haughtily announces that she was going to take a bath, and that she required assistance; now. You groan before hauling yourself after the idol to the bathroom section, where you are stunned to find her stripping carelessly in front of you. You stare at Rei in shock, your foul mood entirely dispelled by the magnificent sight before your eyes; she merely sniffs as you gaze at her. Her surprisingly moderate bust perks boldly outward, the soft curve of her hips descending towards a deliciously full ass, her lithe legs supported by her delicate feet. Now this made her earlier abuse almost worthwhile, surely such a goddess could be allowed a few flaws? Surely it was her due to be given such slavish attention, surely you had deserved such ill-treatment for not paying proper homage to Rei? The illusion of divinity is shattered however, when Rei responds to your adoration with scorn, "Ew, could you not look at me like that, it's weird. Also, get naked already, didn't I tell you to listen you moron?"

So you gingerly remove your clothes, wincing as you strain your sore muscles, and by the time you are finished Rei is already standing in the luxurious hot tub. With her hands on her hips, she gives you an exasperated look, and you scramble up into the bath to avoid another irritating tongue-lashing. You sit down with a sigh, decompressing in the soothing warm waters, water-jets massaging your aching back in a most pleasant fashion. Your momentary calm is cracked somewhat when Rei proceeds to plop down into your lap, her ample bottom squishing up against your groin as she reclines against you. You are rendered speechless by her sudden intimacy, and surprisingly, she is just as quiet. Rei seems content to use you as furniture as she relaxes, and in this moment of tranquility you take in your surroundings in more detail. A sprawling plethora of bottles precariously perch on the further edge of the hot tub, while the rim to your right is taken up entirely with sexual accessories. The bathroom area itself was relatively clean, but clutter was gradually overrunning every available surface; most noticeable was the trash can overflowing with condom wrappers, Rei was obviously a healthy girl...

Rei starts slightly as you harden, but otherwise seems content to ignore the fact that your cock is currently digging into her butt. She wriggles a little to reposition, then relaxes once more, until eventually she sighs and stands up out of the water. She glances back at you, "Your size?" Rei asks as she reaches towards the boxes of condoms. Nodding at your answer, she pulls out a string of them and tosses them at you before ordering you to close your eyes as she fiddles with some sort of tube. You hear Rei let out a soft curse, "Ugh, it's so cold..." then water churns and she grumbles at you, "Well, put it on already!" You open your eyes to find her scowling down at you, and you hurriedly hoist our crotch out of the water so you can slip a condom onto it. You reach towards Rei, only for her to slap your hands away, "Hey! No, sit back down! And don't you dare move, I hate it when guys act like they're not just dildos." With that out of the way, and giving you one final glare in warning, she turns around and lowers herself once more onto your crotch. But this time the burning heat of the water is replaced by the much more subdued warmth of Rei's insides, as she slowly slides your length into herself. Her plump ass squirms as she settles into her new perch, and she is soon gently rocking back and forth in your lap while her hands are busy between her thighs. Her pink hair tickles your face as she grinds on your bulging cock, teasing it endlessly as she pleasures herself. Rei's entire weight is pressed onto your cock as she lifts her legs, the roiling water supporting her as she precisely orients her body to force you as deep as possible. Then Rei lets out a sudden squeak, and she quivers against you, her hole clenching tight around your now painfully erect member.

Rei shudders, her asshole palpitating as she relaxes back against your chest, breathing heavily as she eases her weight off of your manhood. After resting against you for about a minute or so, oblivious to your cock as it throbs inside of her, she pushes herself up off of you in a cascade of water. You get a faceful of ass, and as she bends forward her slightly gaping brown anus is revealed, glistening wetly and flushed from use. Rei notices you staring and quickly turns around, covering herself as she does, "What, it's not like I would let you fuck my unused pussy, I'm saving it for my beloved!" You highly doubt that Rei's cunt had gone unstretched during her stint as a trainee, but you are far more focused on the fact that you had not been able to finish. The bratty idol gives you a confused look as she notices your demeanor, "Oh, did you not cum...? Feel free to jack off into the condom or something, just don't make a mess!" Humming cheerfully, she clambers out of the hot tub and is soon ensconced in an oversized fluffy towel; whereupon she putters off towards the living area, dripping water everywhere. Grumbling, and still staggeringly erect, you dry yourself off before following her, finding Rei sprawled on her couch flicking through channels. Not even deigning to glance at you, she reminds you to clean up all the water you got on the floor walking over there. Rolling your eyes you obey, though not without complaining under your breath, by the time you finished up and returned to your spoiled mistress she has already switched to watching porn. Loud moans and squeals blare from the enormous television as some woman is getting absolutely railed on screen. Rei is already masturbating shamelessly upon her discarded towel, her dark nipples starkly erect.

The idol glances over as you approach and nods in satisfaction as she notices that your dick is still hard, she scrambles around so that her plump posterior is pointed right at you, "Grab a condom, but follow my orders exactly, okay? My butt is very delicate." Sheathed once more in latex supplied from an ever-present condom box, you gently grasp her hips, "Okay, so put a lot of lube in, gently, then slowly ease your dick in, got it?" Instructions which you ignore entirely, as you simply shove your cock directly into Rei's vulnerable asshole. Whose back arches up as she shrieks in surprise, wailing as if she had just been poleaxed. The bitch was obviously exaggerating however, your dick had slid smoothly inside of her, only catching a little at the entrance, evidently Rei had squirted so much lube inside of herself earlier that she still had loads of it coating her insides. Not that she sees it that way, "YOU DUMB FUCK! TAKE IT OUT TAKE IT OUT!" she howls, clawing at the couch for support as her legs shudder. But you are done taking orders from this entitled brat, and pull back, dragging a solid inch of her insides along with you, Rei barely has time to gasp out "Oh thank-" before you slam your entire length back into her guts. This time she is only able to let out an outraged gasp, unable to comprehend how a lowly fan like you could possibly disobey a chaebol of IVE.

Of course, most other idols would not have stood for such treatment either, Yeji would have been clawing your back into bloody ribbons, Rose would have been beating you mercilessly, Jihyo would have pinned you down and firmly forced you inside the proper hole, Dami would have had you biting the couch as she pummeled you with a gargantuan strapon. Instead, Rei, scion of a renowned idol training program, promptly bursts into noisy tears. Normally a girl sobbing would have given you pause, and caused you to rush to give her comfort, but this bitch had been abusing you for hours now, and it seemed a bit of an overreaction; so you continue. Rei blubbers as loudly as the girl on screen, bemoaning her fate and tepidly demanding that you listen to her. But by now you were getting into the swing of things, and to be completely honest her asshole was practically sucking you inside after every thrust. Her thick ass-cheeks clap loudly as you slam yourself against them again and again, providing a meaty cushion that was almost begging for a thoroughly rough plowing. So you give it to them, violently pistoning your cock into her guts, causing her to squeak plaintively and writhe in your grasp as you firmly hold her steady. Then Rei starts to shake, her ass shivering in a familiar way, you don't stop moving though, even when she suddenly starts to scream shrilly, spittle flying onto the couch.

Something hot and wet slops onto your balls, sticking tight to it and smearing deep into its folds. Surprised, you pull out, leaving Rei's asshole gaping enough to show pink and sputtering foully, and beneath that, a shaven pussy absolutely slathered with cunt cream, connected her sex to yours with glistening streamers. She whines in embarrassment, looking back at you in disbelief at the mess she had made, her squeezable cheeks flushing bright red. Before Rei could make any excuses however you had crammed your cock back into her sloppy ass, causing her to groan and bite the fabric. A glow with satisfaction with yourself, you fall back into your rough rhythm, plowing away with enough force to make her ass-cheeks jiggle with every thrust. The steady slap of skin fills the room as you relentlessly fuck Rei, drowning out the depravities taking place on the TV, (by this point the woman appeared to be taking four cocks at once). But Rei wasn't an idol for nothing, and even after such ungentle treatment her butt still devoured your manhood voraciously; squeezing it tightly without any sign of tiring. Your tip grows warmer as you continue to pound away at her hole, it even starts to feel a bit wet within the rubber. The added stimulation is enough to make your heartily sore balls finally start to pulse, and you feel pleasure emanating from the base of your cock, urging you to go deeper. Groaning loudly, you haul Rei back as hard as you can, squishing against her butt with all your might as you climax spectacularly, filling your condom with thick reams of semen. Rei moans in sympathy, but a note of confusion turns her sweet tones shrill, "Oh fuck yes- WAIT. Wait you idiot you're fucking cumming in me! Oh fuck there's so much! Pull out fuckwit, pull out!" Startled by the sudden vehemence in her voice, you abruptly pull out of her, her unplugged asshole sloppily burping your seed out into the creamy filth already coating her sex. Now that it is exposed, you are able to clearly see the issue, your sex had been so violent it had torn the condom open, allowing your cum to surge into Rei's unprotected asshole; who is not taking it well.

"Fuckfuckfuckfuck! It's so slimy and gross! I fucking hate cum! How fucking dare you cum in me! Ugh I feel like I'm going to puke!" she staggers upright, scowling furiously at you as she stumbles towards the bathroom. She points angrily at her door, "Out! Get the fuck out!" she screams, pulling herself onto the toilet and squatting upon it like a gargoyle. You quickly dress under her glare, as she starts to shit the vast amount of semen you had pumped into her. Once out the door, you report to the staff member, who seems unsurprised to discover that she had kicked you out of her room. They instruct you to return tomorrow, apparently the assistants were quietly cycled between the girls until they caught on and demanded their removal permanently. You are utterly shocked the next day then when you are once more ordered to wait upon Rei. Led to her familiar door, you find the brat hunched in front of a tablet, morosely jotting upon it with a stylus. She grunts as she sees you, frowning unhappily, rolling the stylus nimbly through her fingers as she ponders something deeply. Finally though she sighs, and demands that you strip once more. You nervously comply, worried about what sort of depraved revenge Rei has in store for you. But instead she simply stalks over to her bed, casting off her clothes as she goes, whereupon she bends over, looking back at you with annoyed trepidation.

"Well, what are you waiting for, idiot? You had better not break your condom this time! Oh and- um," Rei blushes in embarrassment, seemingly mortified that she has to say this, "please be rough again..."

[fatehbaz]

Originally I had attached these tags about British imperial forestry to a post about United States treatment of forests, Indigenous peoples, and land administration from 1900-ish to 1935-ish, during a transition period when clear-cutting logging was threatening profit so the US turned to a German- and British-influenced "sustained yield" forestry paradigm:

And in response, someone added:

In the midst of the first Empire Forestry Conference of scientists, academics, and administrators in 1920, the chairman of the Forestry Commission of Britain, Lord Lovat, said that forests were "grown for use and not for mere ornament ... Forests are national assets only so far as they supply the raw material for industrial development."

Rajan (in Modernizing Nature) directly quotes professor of forestry at Oxford, R.S. Troup, who had been influential in the Indian forest service; at the same forestry conference in 1920, Troup promoted sustained yield like this: "Conservation was a 'wise and necessary measure' but it was 'only a stage towards the problem of how best to utilise the forest resources of the empire'. The ultimate ideal was economic management [...], which regarded forests as capital assets, fixed annual yields in such a manner as to exploit 'to the full interest on this capital [...]' and aimed for equal annual yields so as to sustain the market and provide regular supplies of timber to industry."

One of the big - and easily accessible/readable - summaries of the shift to sustained yield and rise of US and British administrators embracing "economic management" of forests:

Modernizing Nature: Forestry and Imperial Economic Development, 1800-1950. S. Ravi Rajan. 2006.

Concise look at the trajectory from East India Company and Royal Navy timber reserves; to British foresters training in Germany and/or in German traditions (including sustained yield) before joining as officers in the powerful British-Indian land administration bureaucracy; to US scientists being trained by those British administrators; to 1920s/1930s Empire Forestry Conferences promoting industry while identifying forests as essential to power.

---

This has also been covered by:

Vinita Damodaran, Richard Grove, Jeyamalar Kathirithamby-Wells, Jonathan Saha, Gregory Barton, Rohan D'Souza.

More summaries of the situation (shorter length, accessible):

"Imperial Environmentalism or Environmental Imperialism? European Forestry, Colonial Forests and the Agenda of Forest Management in the British Empire, 1800-1900". S. Ravi Rajan, In: Nature and Orient: Essays on Environmental History of South and South East Asia, 1998.

"'Dominion over palm and pine': the British Empire forestry conferences, 1920-1947". J.M. Powell, Journal of Historical Geography, Volume 33, Issue 4, October 2007.

Elsewhere, Elizabeth DeLoughrey and George Handley described it like this: 'These forest reserves [...] did not necessarily represent "an atavistic interest in preserving the 'natural' [...]" but rather "a more manipulative and power-conscious interest in constructing new landscapes [...]."' While Sharae Deckard adds: '[T]he subversive potential of the "green" critique [...] was defused by the extent to which growing environmental sensibilities enabled imperialism to function more efficiently by appropriating botanical knowledge and indigenous conservation methods [...].'

---

And the book:

Commonwealth Forestry and Environmental History: Empire, Forests and Colonial Environments in Africa, the Caribbean, South Asia and New Zealand.

Edited by Damodaran and D'Souza, with work from conferences hosted by Grove, in 19 chapters including:

"Worlds Apart? The Scottish Forestry Tradition and the Development of Forestry in India" (K. Jan Ootheok); "Redeeming Wood by Destroying the Forest: Shola, Plantations and Colonial Conservancy on the Nilgiris in the Nineteenth Century" (Deborah Sutton); "Nature's Tea Bounty: Plant Colonialism and 'Garden' Capitalism in the British Empire" (Jayeeta Sharma); "Industrialized Rainforests: The Ecological Transformation of the Sri Lankan Highlands, 1815-1900"; "Forestry and Social Engineering in the Miombo Woodlands of South-Eastern Tanganyika" (Thaddeus Sunseri)

---

Rajan also points out (again in Modernizing Nature):

"[An] extremely important aspect to the repackaging [of forestry science and management] [...] [and] a critical principle that stands out here is that of sustained yield, or sustainability (Nachhaltigekeit). This concept was fundamental [...]. By the turn of the [twentieth] century a large pan-colonial [British-United States] scientific community was in existence, trained in the German and French tradition of forestry [...]. Following the revolt of 1857, the government of [British] India sought to pursue active interventionist policies [...]. Experts were deployed as 'scientific soldiers' [...]. Dietrich Brandis [...], considered the founder of Indian forestry [...] married Rachel Marshman, who was [...] also the sister of the wife of General Havelock, a close friend of Lord Dalhouse, the then governor-general of India. On Havelock's recommendation, Brandis was put in charge of the forests of [...] Burma [...] and was subsequently appointed inspector-general of forests of India. [...] He also trained prospective foresters of the forest department of the USA, including Gifford Pinchot. [...] Chancellor Bismarck gave the visiting British Prime Minister Gladstone an oak sapling [...]. Prussia prided itself on helping devise [...] modern forest management. [...] [T]he Forestry Commision [...], [or] [t]he Imperial Visionaries, as they became known, believed that an increase in primary production in the tropical dependent empire would result in the growth of the British economy. [...] They deemed their own job to be serving the imperial economy."

---

And also:

Empire Forestry and the Origins of Environmentalism. GA Barton, 2002.

"Colonialism and Green Science: History of Colonial Scientific Forestry in South India, 1820-1920". VM Ravikumar Vejendala, Indian Journal of History of Science, 47:2, pages 241-259, 2012.

"Imperialism, Intellectual Networks, and Environmental Change: Unearthing the Origins and Evolution of Global Environmental History." Vinitia Damodaran and Richard Grove, in Nature's End: History and the Environment, 2009.

"The Reconfiguration of Scientific Career Networks in the Late Colonial Period: The Case of Food and Agriculture Organization and the British Colonial Forestry Service" by Jennifer Gold, and "A Network Approach to the Origins of Forestry Education in India, 1855-1885" by Brett M. Bennett. Both chapters are form Science and Empire, 2011.

Triumph of the Expert: Agrarian Doctrines of Development and the Legacies of British Colonialism. Joseph Morgan Hidge, in Series in Ecology and History, 2007.

Nature and Nation: Forests and Development in Peninsular Malaysia. Jeyamalar Kathirithamby-Wells, 2005. And also: "Peninsular Malaysia in the context of natural history and colonial science." Jeyamalar Kathirithamby-Wells, New Zealand Journal of Asian Studies, Volume 11, Number 1, 2009.

"Empires of Forestry: Professional Forestry and State Power in Southeast Asia, Part 1". Peter Vandergeest and Nancy Lee Peluso, Environment and History 12, no. 1, pages 31-64, February 2006.

[incognitopolls]

Tag directory

#Not polls – everything on this blog that's not a poll. Includes answered asks, administrative posts, etc.

–

#Polls about the Bathroom – toilet usage, human waste, public restrooms, and other bathroom habits including brushing your teeth; many of these have the #unsanitary or #gross tags

#Polls about the Body – anatomy, physical attributes, bodily functions; many of these polls reference genitals

#Polls about Brains – mental health, neurodiversity, thinking,

#Polls about Clothes – what you wear and how/when you wear it

#Polls about Critters – pets, wild animals, bugs, etc

#Polls about Ethics – moral questions, right & wrong

#Polls about Etiquette – politeness, social rules/scripts

#Polls about Health – medical topics, medication, dentistry, illness, disability

#Polls about the Home – housing, living situations, housekeeping, cleaning, home organization, etc

#Polls about Interests – catchall tag for media and hobbies including books, tv shows, music, fanfiction, etc

#Polls about the Internet – website features, app usage, internet safety

#Polls about Jobs – work, employment & unemployment, bosses, coworkers

#Polls about Language – linguistics, pronunciation, foreign languages

#Polls about LGBTQ+ Stuff – gender, sexuality, romantic orientation

#Polls about Money – money, finances, savings

#Polls about Polls – poll meta

#Polls about Relationships – friendships, family dynamics, dating, sexual relationships, etc

#Polls about School – any and all education & learning

#Polls about Sex – sex, masturbation, horniness; most of these contain adult content

#Polls about Showers – showers & bathing

#Polls about Sleep – sleep, dreams, bedtime, bed arrangement, etc

#Polls about the World – geography, demographics, and worldwide questions

#Miscellaneous polls – anything that doesn't fit into a more specific category listed here

[simtleman]

The Venice Express (Download Tray Files & CC)

So I've been receiving a few DMs asking me whether my lots are up on The Gallery or somewhere else to be downloaded. To be more specific, my Grand Express (Columbia Station) Lot seems to be getting a lot of attention (which I'm so, so glad!).

As you may already know if you follow my Tumblr, my game and therefore my save file is kinda messed up ever since the last update (mostly my UI), so unfortunately I don't think I'll be able to share that lot with you guys. However, I've decided to create a brand new train from scratch and finally contribute somehow to this thriving historical Sims 4 community I'm loving so much. I may not have the talent to create CC myself, but as a former stylist I sure can put things others have created together to make 'em look nice lol. Without further delay, allow me to introduce you to The Venice Express!

Clearly inspired by the legendary and breathtaking Venice Simplon Orient-Express, the lot consists of a three wagon train (two of them with private cabins, the third one featuring a lounge bar and a small kitchen), a log cabin and a recreation area with a wooden arbor. Here are some screenshots:

Private cabins (they're all practically equal):

Lounge bar wagon/kitchen:

Log cabin:

Before you go ahead and download it into your game, a few IMPORTANT disclaimers:

The lot is a 50x50. If you want the enviroment to look just like my screenshots, make sure to place it in the big lot on top of the hill on Mount Komorebi.

I use ReShade in all my screenshots, so lighting/colors may vary from what it looks like on your game.

I used items from a few expansions and packs (listed in picture below), so if you don't own them those items might be replaced with others.

Like all my builds, this is a heavily CC based lot. If you don't have a powerful PC, it might get laggy while trying to play with it.

Regarding the CC, I do not own nor take credit from any item included within this lot. All credit goes to their amazing creators.

The .ZIP file (3.19 GB) includes two folders: one for the Tray Files and another one with all the CC. I'm 100% sure all the CC I used is already public for everyone; if it's not, it's been definitely longer than three weeks since it has all been in my game and you (the CC creator) shouldn't be putting content behind permanent paywalls to begin with ;)

I did use bb.moveobjects on while building and have NOT playtested it, so you might have to move some items for them to be functional.

The lot is currently set as a Residential, but you can certainly change it to anything else... including a Residential Rental and perhaps making each cabin a different apartment.

That's all for me! This is the very first piece of content I share for others to download, so if you run into any kind of issues do not hesitate to let me know and I'll try to help best I can :)

If you do like it, please make sure to like this post (maybe even comment on it if you feel kind enough!) and please, please, PLEASE do tag me on your screenshots if you share them here on Tumblr. I'd love to see what you guys make with it!

Download: Mediafire

Enjoy ♡

[the-fluff-piece]

Catching Smoke

A long Smoker romance fanfic where he gets to be the strong, grumpy, hot marine we know and love, falling for his capable sexy secretary(you!) that keeps him functional and saves his ass about as many times as he saves yours.

It's a secret enemies to lovers slowburn longfic that I will try to update every Sunday. Comment below to be tagged with every update!

Part 1 - where you land in the marine base g-5 and meet Smoker for the first time!

The last thing you saw was a giant paw, then you flew in this strange way for three days - and things went black.

When you woke up again, you were in some kind of hospital, but all the other beds were empty. Your head was aching and spinning, but you had to get up, get back to your friends, help them against the marines. You needed to get back to sabaody.

You limbed to the only door you could see and opened it, daylight blinded your sensitive eyes and sent a bolt of pain through your head. Blinking, you tried to get some orientation - and saw marines, lots of them. They ignored you for the most part, only a few especially ragged looking specimen wandered towards you with lopsided grins.

"Sleeping beauty woke up! Hey dove, wanna have a good time with me?" A mean looking soldier said in the grimiest voice imaginable. He had long, brown hair and wore his uniform a bit more lose than the others. He would have been handsome if not for the disgusting expression on his face.

"Fuck off!" Was your only comment as you moved, painfully slowly, in the opposite direction, down a corridor. Even you could handle a few of those conscripted losers. You were half sure. Were was your weapon?

"What was that?" the soldier grunted behind you.

"Kitten has claws" commented another one.

"We will show you what it means to-" the first one added, but was cut short by a female voice.

"Ah, there you are miss! Sorry, may I pass?" A woman with a sword approached. Her black hair was cut short. She squinted and studied your face - you didn't know her. You hoped she didn't recognize you - you may not have a wanted poster, yet, but after being involved in that kind of shit show? You couldn't be sure anymore. She was holding up a stack of papers and seemed to check your face against a picture- fuck!

Panicking, you tried to make out a way to escape before she would throw you into the hellhole named imple down. Would your friends save you? Were they even alive?

"You're an applicant for the position of secretary?" She finally asked, holding up the paper so you could see the picture. It looked nothing like you.

"Uh, sure" you answered.

"Excellent! I am captain Tashigi. Please follow me!" She turned and briskly walked away.

It looked like she was your ticket out of this situation, so you trotted off behind her - shooting the asshole soldiers a deadly glare. You hoped she would lead you around the base and that her obvious bad eyesight would give you plenty of opportunities to escape.

The base was enormous. A labyrinth of hallways, doors and stairways.

Tashigi, you knew that name from your crew mates. She was always partnered with the white hunter, Smoker. Fuck. That one was mean. A logia user that was set on capturing the strawhats. You had to get away before he saw you, he was a not called a hunter for nothing. There was no chance you could escape him.

You tried to assess your position - you were in a marine base, the blind swordswoman thought you were applying for a secretary position. Who ever you would be talking to - they would get you out somehow after the interview was over. Maybe you would have to be shipped to a civilian harbour, from where you could plot your return to sabaody. Your head was killing you, but you didn't have to give them a good performance. Surely this was just with some captain or low ranking service personnel.

Tashigi stopped at a door and knocked. A deep, growling voice answered: "come in".

Tashigi opened the door and you followed - and it took all your willpower not to curse loudly.

In a chair behind a huge wooden desk sat a man with white hair and two cigars in the corner of his mouth - Smoker. His jackett was open and he didn't wear anything underneath, his hands were in dark gloves and folded on top of the desk. He looked annoyed and angry. And, in a scary kind of way, really handsome. His broad build and white hair were unusual, but interesting. Next to him, your crewmates looked like scrawny boys.

You froze and swallowed.

"Commander Smoker, this is another applicant for the position of your secretary!" she informed him, saluting.

"Ah, I thought we saw every one of them! Of course, please, sit!" His demeanor changed somewhat, he now seemed nervous. His eyes widened and he bend a bit, like he wanted to make his enormous body a bit smaller.

You sat down on a ragged chair in front of the desk. Smoker sat down opposite you and Tashigi next to you. Trapped. Fuck.

Gathering all your strenght and acting ability, you managed to plaster a broad smile onto your face and said with the softest, most professional voice you could manage "pleased to meet you, sir!"

He nodded.

"Welcome miss...?" his voice trailed off as he was shifting through the pile of papers on his desk.

"Y/n" you answered. You were now sure that he didn't know your face. It was unlikely he knew your name. He nodded again. The angry expression returned to his face, like it was the default state his face took, whenever there was no other emotion to transport.

He continued digging around the absolute chaos covering his desk, eventually giving up with a sigh.

"I don't have time to coddle you, Miss, so I'll cut to the chase. Can you help me and captain Tashigi with this" he gestured towards the mess of paper on his desk like it was an unsolvable problem, "so that we can do our jobs?"

You were so perplexed - you nodded out of habit. And fear. All your head was filled with were the stories of your crewmates parading through your head. He beat them, all.of them. He beat Luffy. He was smoke. Couldn't be touched.

"Great. You're hired. That's all." He hit the top of the desk with his hands and almost broke it in the process, ripping you out of your panicked thoughts.

"WHAT?" you screeched, shocked.

"Miss?" he seemed confused.

You coughed and tried to calm yourself, you needed to come up with something.

"Oh I am not sure. I'll think about it and call you in a week or so. When is the next ship away from here...?"

Smoker and Tashigi looked at each other.

"Next ship off this base for civilians is in three days. Please Miss..." he seemed a bit overwhelmed, going with his fingers through his white hair "just try it out, Miss. I promise this will be a great opportunity." He seemed to try hard to sound calm and nice. Tashigi added, much to Smoker's annoyance: "all the other candidates ran off. We're really desperate!"

"Tashigi shut up!" He barked at her and she froze.

"Give us three days, Miss. You won't get back sooner anyway. Let me show you around." He stood up. You were still dizzy - and hungry. Your stomach growled. His eyes wandered towards your midsection.

"I'll show you the mess hall. Lunch is on me." Smoker said and already stomped out of the room. You and Tashigi followed, half Jogging, to keep up with his long strides. You were always a little jealous that all the others had bounties and wanted posters except for you - now it came in handy. Big time.

The mess hall was huge, filled with marine soldiers gulping down typical army rations. Not very appetizing, especially after being pampered by one of the best cooks in the world, but food was food.

Every soldier who saw the three of you saluted and greeted Smoker, he seemed well respected among marines. He nodded in response. No one dared to even look at you inappropriatly.

"If you want to, we can go to the captain's mess, food is a bit better there." Smoker said, looking a little puzzled.

"No, here's fine" you answered. Best not to overplay your hand. The food line was moving remarkably quickly and when it was your turn your realized why: there was one meal handed out. Some kind of brownish stew with potatoes. Well.

Smoker, Tashigi and you sat down on a bench at the long tables, right in the middle of the soldiers, it felt quite odd not to be shot at and attacked by those uniform wearing bastards.

Smoker and Tashigi started planning the rest of their day: training, stretegic meetings. Or rather, Smoker was barking at her while she nodded and made the occasional comment.

You tried the food - fortunately, it was quite tasteless. This was no fun, but it filled your stomach. The portion was so huge, you couldn't finish it. Looking around, you started to realise what being a marine really meant - and how massive the organisation really was. All those people, supply chains, organisation. All that material.

"If you don't like the food, we can find a solution!" Smoker said as he saw you laying down your cutlery. Both Smoker and Tashigi seemed concerned.

"No, it's fine" you answered, hearing a sigh of relief from both of them. They were desperate.

"So tell me commander" you tried to sound as business as you possibly could, "you seem to have run out of options for the position, why is that?" You asked, getting interested in the inner workings of the marine.

"Well uhm...we need someone for the paperwork, but this particular base is not so popular." Smoker poked at his food with the fork. "They're good men, but they lack manners. All the office personnel capable of doing administrative jobs has quit." He scowled. "But I assure you that you are under my personal protection, and the rules for soldiers of course don't apply to you. Headquarters is willing to pay a good salary and you will not have to participate in drills or such things." He explained.

You felt a little sorry for those two, they seemed like okay people at least. And you had to get along with them for three days.

"I'll have a look" you said, earning a smile from both.

"And I won't wear a uniform!" you told them, getting a little bold.

"Of course not!" Smoker reinforced his promise not to treat you like a soldier.

The three of you returned to what was clearly Smoker's office again. There was no one to explain the system to you, not even Smoker or Tashigi. They pretty much left you to get an overview by yourself while they trained and drilled their soldiers.

You started to look through the mess of papers, forms and memos. It was quite informative. Since he was commander of the base, the paperwork on his desk included lots of classified information and an excellent insight into the organisation of the marine as a whole. There were memos about the whereabouts of high ranking officers, troop movements, supply shipments, secret news - a whol cornucopia of secrets you could use against them.

This was a gold mine of information. Information that could be useful in the future for a pirate. You sorted and stacked the papers by type and date and just a few hours later, the office looked a lot tidier. You were putting away some uninteresting files in what seemed the proper place when Smoker returned, his jacket flung over his shoulder. He was glistening with sweat and showing off his muscular chest without seeming to notice how appealing he looked. For a short moment, your face must have been a grimace of shock mixed with a sleazy smile. You jumped up, trying not to look at the hot marine soldier in front of you and pushed around some more papers while greeting him nervously "wel-welcome back commander!"

He nodded absent-mindedly and threw himself in a big comfortable leather chair in the corner of his office. He let his arms hang down the sides, sighind deeply. Like he was posing for you, presenting his broad chest with deeps breaths.

He looked around, one of his cigars almost fell out of his mouth as he probably saw the surfaces of the tables for the first time ever.

"I see you already got to work!" He nodded in admiration. "I didn't expect to see order so soon!" Relieved, he leaned back with his arms behind his head, showcasing his chest even more.

"If you continue like this, we will get along excellently. And I will finally be able to do my real job." he leaned back, relaxed and self-content.

Even though he provoked lewd thoughts about licking his torso from the gutter of your mind, it bugged you that he treated you like this thing was already settled.

"You will have to keep order as well, commander. It is your office." you sternly stated, immediately causing his brows to crease again.

"That is not how you talk to me Lad-" he berated you - or tried.

"You have responsibilities here. Act like it." you shut him up, crossing your arms in front of your chest. You knew that you had to win a few powerplays with him to get his respect - and not get trampled under his demands.

He ground his teeth, almost biting one of his cigars in half.

"I am going to let that slide - for now." he begrudgingly said.

"I have put all the communication marked with "urgent" on your desk. That is, all that are still relevant. Some are months old" you pointed to his desk.

He got up and moved to inspect your work, visibly reigning his anger in.

He sat down and started to look at the papers, angrily puffing out clouds of smoke.

"I don't need to know all that crap" he said- and froze. There was a memo about Luffy's involvement at Sabaody - it surely interested him.

It sure as hell was interesting to you. He, and the rest of the crew, were missing. You prayed that they landed on friendly islands and not marine bases. The more meat-headed of your comrades would be in real trouble, otherwise.

You watched as his face derailed into an expression of utter shock.

"STRAW HATS! DEFEATED???" he barked at the paper in his hands.

"FIREFIST ACE - CAPTURED???" He grunted as he got to the Next page.

"AND THE EXECUTION IS IN 2 DAYS?" He sunk back into his chair, exhausted by the news.

"And your attendance is required" you informed him, smugly.

He answered with a puff of smoke and a defeated grunt.

"Well, we still have enough time to get there. I'll leave tomorrow morning"

"If you don't keep order and read the news from headquarters, you'll miss such things" you rubbed his shortcoming into his face. Powerplay - won!

"Dismissed." Smokers brown eyes glared at you as he barked the order.

He knew he had lost, you were sure of it.

You trotted out with a spring in your step, getting greeted by Tashigi, that proceeded to show you to your room.

Smoker

Smoker slumped into his chair after he ordered his new secretary out. Compared to him, she was small. No doubt she had never been in a real fight. But she stood before him and didn't flinch. She had spunk. It was hard to admit it, but as he excelled as a soldier and a hunter for pirate bounties, he was lost amidst all this bureaucracy, rules and politics.

And it was time to admit that if he wanted to stay on top of things, he needed help.

He needed her, and she had shown that to him today. His hand glided nervously through his hair. For some reason, he felt giddy, nervous. Excited. Their little exchange had been something new. Tashigi rarely stood up to him, and never like that. He looked forward to what she would present him with in the future.

He needed to think about how to make her stay. It was not his forté.

-----

This one has been in my wips for a year...I planned to post it once it was finished, but I don't think this will happen anytime soon if I don't give myself a weekly deadline....

I recently saw that a smoker was cast for season 2 of life action. Smoking hot.

See you next Sunday for more smokey

[literaryvein-reblogs]

Writing Notes: On Laughter & Humour

Just a few notes on laughter and humour that I compiled to help with writing about characters laughing or joking or having a sense of humour. References I used are included at the end.

Most of the laughter we produce has nothing to do with humour.

We use laughter for various communicative functions, such as to show agreement and understanding or to ease social tension.

Laughter is also a form of conversational punctuation, often occurring at the end of sentences and phrases.

Laughter vs Humour

“Humor is an evoked response to storytelling and shifting expectations. Laughter is a social signal among humans. It’s like a punctuation mark.” (Carl Marci, MD, an assistant professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and the director of social neuroscience in the Psychotherapy Research Program at Massachusetts General Hospital)

Humans have 2 Distinct Types of Laughter

Duchenne laughter: an involuntary, reactive, and emotional response. External events and positive emotions drive this laughter.

Non-Duchenne laughter: more voluntary, controlled, and deliberate. Although Non-Duchenne laughter is used more in conversational settings, it is sometimes referred to as “the dark side of laughter” as it is sometimes used to mock and degrade others.

Different Types of Laughter

Tickling

Taunting

Sniffing

Schadenfreude: Expressing pleasure about someone's misfortune

Through nasal cavity

Nasal cavity open

Laughter phrases

Joyful/friendly

Inhalation and voiced

Inhalation and exhalation

Fricative: Involves friction from the throat, with strong consonant sounds and grunts or pants

Vowel-oriented: Laughter is usually of longer duration and employs song-like properties. Typically begins with a "ha/he/ho" sound.

Cough-like

Affiliative: Expresses mirth, social bonding, and cooperation. It is a sign of social acceptance.

De-escalative: Relieves discomfort and dissipates the stress in the room. (E.g., Laughing at an inappropriate joke signifies that no offense was taken and is meant to assuage social interactions. It also signifies to others that it is okay to laugh, and the environment is non-threatening.)

Power laughter: An expression of superiority. It reinforces the power dynamics of social interactions and conveys mockery. (E.g., bosses often use this type of laughter with employees who are less powerful.)

Humans Experience the Humour of a Joke in 3 Phases

The listener encounters some type of incongruity: a punch line that seems out of place compared with the joke’s set-up.

Following a cognitive construct called surprise and coherence, the listener tries to resolve this incongruity.

The listener’s brain determines the joke’s sense—or lack thereof—and decides whether or not the joke is funny.

“The body sends a signal to the brain that says, ‘Hey, that’s clever, that’s worth it,’ and we laugh.” (Carl Marci)

Instead of "laugh" you may write:

VERBS: chuckle, giggle, express mirth, roar with laughter, chortle, guffaw, snicker, titter, snigger, cackle, break up, split one's sides, roll in the aisle, howl

NOUNS: guffaw, giggle, chortle, burst of laughter, roar, cackle, peal of laughter, mirth, glee, snicker, snigger, horselaugh, belly laugh, ha-ha, ho-ho

Sources & related articles: 1 2 3 4 5 6 ⚜ More: Writing Notes & References

If these writing notes helped with your poem/story, please tag me. Or leave a link in the replies. I'd love to read them!

[prudentfolly]

Prudence Dubois -- [ B A S I C S ]

B A S I C S

Name: Prudence Dubois

Nicknames: No. 

Age: Late Twenties

Nameday: 32nd Sun of the Umbral Moon

Race: Hyur

Gender: Cis Female

Orientation: Bisexual

Profession: Retainer & Machinist

P H Y S I C A L     A S P E C T S

Hair: Dark brown hair is worn practically. Short with a hacked at fringe. She doesn’t do much with it, thinking of it as more of a hindrance than a tool to express herself with.

Eyes: Watchful, hooded, hawklike. Like burning coals with none of the heat.

Skin: Pale white, covered in freckles.

Tattoos/scars: No tattoos. A gnarly scar at her left collarbone, and follows through on her back. A smattering of other, less important scars. 

F A M I L Y

Parents: Her father is deceased, aided by gravity. She does not speak of nor to her mother who still lives in the Brume. Their names are unimportant.

Siblings: N/A. 

Grandparents: Long dead, likely insufferable judging by how their children turned out.  

In-laws and Other: No In-laws to speak of. She has many romantic entanglements that usually end messily. So far, her relationship with Ibant is the only one to have stuck.

She and Gerry, one of her Lady’s wards, have an on-again-off-again toxic yuri relationship that will eventually settle into a steady friendship or explode in an awesome and destructive display.

She respects and, to some degree, loves her Lady.

A’vyra is the nearest thing to a friend she has outside the House. Not that Prudence would ever utter such a thing aloud.

The rest of the House’s odd assortment of characters are kept at a distance. Prudence is fully aware of her prickly personality and the strength of her bite. These things serve her well; she will not dull them to appease others, so she does not let others in. For their own good, of course.

Pets: No. Prudence technically owns a Chocobo, a gift from her Lady, but Bird is not a pet. Bird is a stalwart companion.

S K I L L S

Abilities: Prudence is a capable young woman. A skilled machinist with a sharp eye it is rare for her to miss.  She knows her carbine better than the skin of her hands, knows the bark of it as her voice.

Her duties as a retainer have sent Prudence to the far corners of many maps. She’s resourceful for all the traveling, with a genuine willingness to embrace local customs. She can chameleon her way through social situations; smoothing the barbs of her generally terrible personality and avoiding unnecessary conflict on the road. 

Hobbies: Tinkering, fishing, painting. 

T R A I T S

Most Positive Trait: She’s so cool. 

Most Negative Trait: Everything else. 

L I K E S

Colors: Deep greens, browns and blacks and greys, a very particular shade of blue. 

Smells: Coffee, warm bread, turpentine. 

Textures: Canvas stretched taut, the cool side of the pillow, the crunch of snow beneath her boots. 

Drinks: Coffee, black. Wine, she’s not picky. 

O T H E R    D E T A I L S

Smokes: Almost constantly.

Drinks: Heavily. She’s a functioning alcoholic.

Drugs: Yes. Mostly for fun. 

Mount Issuance: Prudence is only insured because Bird was gifted to her via legal means. Is he the only thing she trusts enough to ride. Otherwise, she would be walking everywhere and hitching rides where she could.

Been Arrested: Several times! No charges seem to stick, even the most dangerous of heresy. 

][Tagged by:][ @this-is-ris @iron-sparrow @cindernet-explorer!][ Thank you all so much! ][

][ Tagging: ][ @ibant-gleacame & @cindernet-explorer (You have alts!) & You (: ][

[gold-rhine]

Nahida banner is going to run soon and i wanted to talk about her and her pros and cons if you're deciding to wish for her or not. i have both heavily invested c2 nahida who is top 8% on field builds on akasha and f2p no cons horrible support build nahida, so i can talk about different levels of investment.

her pros:

best dendro application in the game with 100% uptime.

sharing of up to 250 EM to on field character, which is very good buff to spread or aggravate carries.

she has insane AOE, you can tag entire room of enemies from far away and they will be dying passively, just from nahida's dot, which is very nice for single-target teams like hyperbloom or nilou teams that can't have grouping.

her less known pro is that she can have very good personal damage if well built, like alhaitham is called "top 3 dps" and my nahida does more damage than my alhaitham on field. the reason alhaitham is even viable is bc nahida is a tiny radish with short legs and is very clumsy to run, dash and attack.

but if you don't want her to do personal damage, she is perfectly functional with purely support build too, which is very easy and quick to get, and with 3 star weapon.

her cons are really good, and her c2 makes any dendro team insane

her banner will have xingqiu and kuki, and with nahida this is a ready made hyperbloom core that will clear one side of the abyss with minimum investment. or any content, to be clear, like if you dont care about abyss, this is a boss killer team.

overall, universal dendro support who can slot into almost any dendro team and has considerable to great personal damage.

her cons:

her insane dendro application is actually too thick and it will overrun other elements, which is very relevant for aggravate teams. you can't swirl electro thru nahida's E, so if enemy didn't die in one rotation, then on second rotation you're swirling leaf and your electro dps will not get damage buff.

another con is that she tags specific enemies, so if you kill a wave and the next wave appears, she needs to come back on field to tag them again. this is a problem for characters like cyno who do damage in long infusion state, he cannot switch to nahida without losing that infusion. characters like baizhu would be more comfortable for this.

as i already said, short child model is clumsy to use on field

her alternatives:

for kinich she doesn't do anything at all, he can be either solo dendro or work with emily

for dendro teams with furina, baizhu is preferred as a healer who can quickly stack fanfare

for nilou, she's still best in slot and tbh nilou with nahida and nilou without nahida is very much night and day, but even so, nilou has enough other option that she will be okay without nahida, with like, yao yao, baizhu, dendro traveler, kirara, tho AOE will tank significantly.

overall, in other dendro teams like spread, aggravate, hyperbloom, burgeon, you can use options like baizhu, yao yao, dendro traveler, kirara. they will have less application and AOE will drop to almost single target, but it will be functional

TLDR:

is nahida still meta? YES. she's still the most universal dendro support and the BEST, arguably only true consistent off field AOE dendro applicator who is not reliant on burst.

is she must pull? no, if you don't want to. when she just came out and there were almost no dendro characters, she was, but now we have enough options, both premium and 4 star, to slot into dendro teams instead of nahida and be functional.

get nahida if you like her and you want strongest AOE dendro support that you can use in almost any dendro teams, but don't feel pressured.

EDIT: if u want to vertically invest in nahida, get her cons, as i already said, her c2 is insane. do NOT get her weapon, its mid as fuck. for damage build yae's kagura is her best option, or any dmg oriented catalyst like widsith or lost prayer. for support, 4 star EM sac frags is about as good, and even 3 star magic guide will work.

EDIT2:

yes, you can use it as a support weapon, esp in nilou teams it'll be good. it's not bad support option if you happen to get it, its just not worth going for specifically. about nahida cons, i would advise to first trying your teams with c0 nahida bc this is more than enough. if nilou and nahida team doesnt feel like it doing damage, i would first look into rotations and if you have EM on the correct character, bc in bloom its crucial to know who will be the trigger

[trans-femme-fag-dyke]

T4T sEggs Cracking

Sex changes when you transition as a t-girl. New realities come into focus. New turn-ons emerge. A world of novel psychological and physiological experiences are added to the mix, or replace it entirely. Hormones and their impact terraform the ecology into a mycelial divine feminine, replete with new pleasure pathways. In short, it is wild and beautiful, feral and oozing with potential.

What I wasn’t prepared for, though, was how transfiguring the experience of T4T sex would be. Not by a mile.

Degrading Glorification

(What follows is a dual narrative, embellished and made whole by my lover’s own description of our tryst, which may I tell you is really fucking hot. Anyone who finds discovery and meaning in the process of writing has my attention and, most likely, my lust).

Just another day on Grindr receiving unsolicited dick pic after dick pic from people who ignore my profile’s clear insistence on T4T only.

While I don’t avail myself of these opportunities, there is something to be said for the euphoria that comes from being seen by cishets as a girl. Even seeing me as an attractive t-girl, if they’re purely fetishizing that tribal identifier, doesn’t hurt. Having spent too many years in the closet as a boy-modular gay, I am immune to the aggression of those advances and treat it more like a research project, tagging each new appendage into its relevant mental taxonomy: thick, thin, black, white, clean, cum-covered, veiny, etc. Back in the day, these advances were perfectly acceptable — direct, to the point, like the hawking of wares in a saturated meat market. I was less interested in what they were attached to as I was in their function. Emotion and personality were cast aside.

As a t-girl, though, there is a crossing of the privilege divide into an East Berlin of fear and insecurity. Too often, and too unpublicized, are the examples of anti-trans violence that it’s simply not the same fuck economy that it used to be. And anyway, my orientation has changed.

Orientation shift in transition is a topic that could command an entire thesis, so I won’t go into it here. Suffice it to say that almost overnight, as the estrogen moved through my body, I lost my interest in gay or straight men. Perhaps because being with a gay guy, although still on the table before secondary sex characteristics set in and I could stealthily navigate those penetrations, would send a dysphoric signal deep into my programming.

I find myself attracted to trans energy mostly.

Grindr is a numbers game in Los Angeles. There’s so much flakiness you become accustomed to being ignored or conversations end abruptly. Not to mention that hooking up here is so governed by travel times which fluctuate wildly throughout the days asymmetrical commuting times, that the whole affair can be a non-started at the outset.

But she responded. Glorious brunette, with long wavy hair, small pursed lips and an aloofness that immediately activated my pathological desire of the emotionally unavailable. What can I say, my mother fucked me up.

She — let’s call her Adeline — lived about 10 minutes away, so in an abundance of well-heeled politeness cut with impatient lust, I went to pick her up.

Cue the usual slightly coy banter as we both worked each other out during the ride. The dissipation of fear which comes with these Grindr “dates” for traps, which always carry a soupçon of terror to them and see us scrambling to etch a last will and testament into our iPhone notes app and share location with friends as it plays out.

I emerged from the bathroom topless.

Oh fuck, she thought, nipple piercings. The most physical symbol of deviance there is.

We started making out on the sofa and immediately some force took a hold of me. I felt like our bodies were fusing inside a blacksmith’s forge. We were glitching like a hacked mainframe, opening up its secrets to Snowden’s deft digital lock-picking. We were like people who hadn’t eaten in days set loose on a Vegas buffet.

I ran my hands over her back and through her hair, interlocking my teeth around her neck and ears. Almost epileptic in spasms of uncontrollable, uncensored I searched for my frontal cortex and managed to articulate that we should move to the bedroom.

My friend S had told me to expect fireworks in my first T4T experience. Their look of both shock and empathetic excitement registered on their FaceTime framed face.

They hinted at the dynamic’s incendiary force with an elliptical smile, leaving me hanging like a teaser trailer.

“I can’t explain it, but there’s just something to that energy, that vibe. I’m so excited for you. Like fucking excited!”

And Jesus fucking christ, they were right. I can see why they held off on the detail. Language fails.

We made our way to the bedroom where I revealed my kink drawer. There’s a cornucopia of debauchery in this unassuming pine wood piece of furniture: masks, paddles, leashes, collars, nipple clamps and floggers.

We negotiated our limits, settling on consensual non-consent. In short, anything goes.

We couldn’t have been more perfectly matched. When she initially shared photos with me on the app she gave a trigger warning around the bruises I’d see. It just so happened that impact play and relishing in the blues, browns, yellows and purples of corporeal graffiti aftermath was something we shared.

“I don’t care if you draw blood,” I assured her.

“Well ok then, you pathetic little slut,” she hissed, “lay the fuck down.”

I hadn’t fully anticipated how rapidly she would turn on the sadistic domme energy and I didn’t question it. I couldn’t.

Mmmmmmmmm, mama’s hungry, I thought as my crotch began to throb.

I don’t need to pull my punches, she thought, I can really indulge this deeper cruelty in me.

“Yes, mistress!” I responded, getting into role as the slut spit dump I’d soon become.

I lay down.

“Open wide, slut,” she ordered as she spat on my face, all the while positioning her mouth over mine and dribbling long translucent threads of drool onto my tongue and down my throat. She lunged for my neck with lupine grace and hunger, digging her teeth in and unleashing eddies of dopamine and oxytocin. I could feel the fledgling bruises on my neck and knew they’d be difficult to hide but at this point she could have pushed a blade into my lungs and I’d have kissed her while the blood bubbled out of my mouth.

These were feelings I had never felt before.

It was like all my shame, low self-esteem, trauma, alienation, anxiety and isolation channeled a lightning strike turning sand into clear shards of luminescent glass.

It felt both individual and collective, all ruptures and salvation of minority stressed gender fuckery, raining down and being soaked up. An effervescent tribal alchemy of ecstatic release.

The power of consensual degradation cannot be underestimated. I took years of being trodden down by things beyond my control. The abuse of my mother, the deprivation of affection, the laundering of all currencies of love through a front of cold calculation. All of this turned to steam through the act of my submitting to it with someone who also made me vibrate with light. All of those times when I had no fucking say in what happened to me, as humanity depriving as it was and violently unfair, I now took back. I resignified it, reclaimed it, decolonized and liberated it.

She attached the leash to my collar and yanked me onto the floor.

“If you’re a good girl, you’ll get a treat.” She said sternly, with the consummate control of a well-etched domme.

Up until now, she’d only really experimented with this role but now, she leapt up into the saddle ready for battle. From where I crouched, lapping up her girl dick with such an eagerness to please, it felt like she’d been doing this all her life.

In the dawn of her 20s, this girl came with a level of sexual confidence and experience that can only be found in trans circles. It’s like our bodies are always searching for each other with odyssean ardor. Simultaneous electrons suspended in tandem states.

I clambered back onto the bed like a dog and she straddled me, our girl dicks entwined in her hand with a vibrator in between. Edging, foreplay, the beautiful mirage of the female orgasm which rises and falls, ebbs and flows, coming into focus then going blurry as the mind and the body speaks in foreign tongues.

It was the kind of sex you never want to end. Constant punishment, submission, bratty deliberate misbehavior, retaliation, good behavior and treats.

“You told me you were going to cum you fucking whore. Well, are you?!” she cursed.

“Fuck my pussy, mistress. I need something in me so I can cum for you.”

One, two, then three fingers entered me as she celebrated my gaping hole.

“I love how loose you are.”

Ugh, I felt so seen. I’ve been trying to make my ass loose for years. It’s been one of my sexual north stars. I want to be able to get entire cities inside me. Until my neo-puzzy arrives, my ass has been my pussy substitute and I’ve wanted her to stretch until my bud becomes labia and turns from circle into that canal like corridor of floral ingress.

It didn’t take long, with my ass full of her hand, and I reached that liquidless trap climax and lay there panting, dripping in spit, sweat, and a sense of sexed gender euphoria I had waited 39 years to feel.

Who knew that in order to feel my most beautiful, it would take this level of degradation.

We languished, dripping in sweat and overtaken by an exhaustion which was held in abeyance by the relentless motor of sex.

“Well, I don’t know about you, but I can’t wait to do that again,” I said, with the last remaining energy and breath left in me.

“We might not be able to. I’m probably moving to Berlin in a few weeks,” she responded with a signature level of matter-of-factness and regret.

Afterword

This is a post from Threads that resonated with me.

@aspirationaltea I think this post is me realizing T4T lesbian is the full explanation of my sexuality at least?

That’s how I walked away from the experience with Adeline. Literally and figuratively changed forever. In one fell swoop a single lover had the power to make me feel seen for the first time in my life.

Now of course any first time has the potential to carry the hyperbole of its impact. But the water that slacks the thirst of the desert stranded is the exact same water we all drink. The difference, however, is life saving.

I would usually chalk up an experience without more penetration as fun but not fulfilling. In this scene I had a few fingers inside me for a few minutes. And yet I lost all sense of time and place, sinking into the experience like feet in clittoral sand.

It was pure T4T lesbian sex, as much connection, edging and build as it was a wham bam teleology. The purpose was communion and connection.

T4T sex transfigures and transubstantiates the entire experience into a physical act. Inside every bite, kiss, spit, yank, finger and curse, was a microcosm of the entire experience of trans identity. Eucharist anointed trap fantasy.

Our shared struggles, estrogen shortages, dirty glances turned our way, rejections. Our alignments, the joyful tears t-girls shed over the smallest things as their emotional synapses reinitiate, our first sports bra. Everything is there, unspoken but enacted ritualistically like the world is burning all around us and we carry on regardless. Which is, alas, what it feels like a lot of the time.

At the core of the experience was the abiding sense of safety which comes from being intimate with someone who knows how important it is to cultivate that in as many spaces, few though they may be, as possible.

In addition, the dimension of kink/BDSM brings its own magnetic locus of individuation and resignification. We find submission, abjectification, degradation, and pain paired up with consent, control, compassion, negotiation, communication, and transcendence. We recontextualize experiences which in every other life domain are precursors or consequences of socially aberrant behavior or undesirable hierarchical role playing.

Whether the sub is in control or the dom is, just as with tops and bottoms, is a question for the ages. The person under the thumb, in so allowing it, arguably possesses some power over the person they artificially and consensually elevate to that position. When you have nothing to lose because you have relinquished it, you can only be net positive existentially.

The point is the horizontal socialism of the trans lesbian experience. No one person controls. All are equal and the roleplay is merely an enactment of the end of dominion by external forces.

For what baits the enemy like getting back on your feet or smiling in their face? As blood streams out of your nostrils and you turn to face your captor ready for another beating, you demonstrate an unwavering faith in the ultimate form of the Golden Rule: if your enemy strikes you, turn the other cheek and ask, “Have I been a good girl, Mistress?”

[the-silent-fellowship]

Hello

We are unsure whether your requests are open or not, but would like to request a -based flag if that is alright. /no pressure

If yes, may we please request a synesthesia-based flag/official term coining for a plural friend of ours?

I believe it would fall under a type of neuro-based, as it is less color oriented and more synesthesia (the condition) oriented.

Thank you for your time, please have a lovely timezone.

Synesthesiabased

[PT: Synesthesiabased]

Synesthesiabased. a system based in one’s Synesthesia. This means Synesthesia has affected the way the system exists, but is not necessarily an origin. This could mean that the system often forms Synesthesia symptom holders, that Synesthesia affects the way a system functions, or anything similar.

Colors and symbol used from this!(link)

[ID: in Alt text]

[ID: in Alt text]

[Tags] @system-term-archive, @pluralitywords, @pluralterms, @radiomogai, @plurchive , @plurplex-archive-dot-net

[fisherkn1ght]

A VERY DESCRIPTIVE PROFILE OF YOUR MUSE: Arisen & Pawn(s) Edition

tagged by: @bees-tes-blog (THANK YOU AGHH🥹)

tagging: @garzzum 😈

(I THINK MOST OF MY MUTUALS HAVE BEEN TAGGED but if you see this.. it's a sign to stop everything and fill this out IMMEDIATELY!!)

(game under the cut ((: )

ARISEN: LEONEN

(I realize I have..0 nice screenshots of him. oh well)

nicknames: 'Leon' (by others), 'Little lion' (by pawn)

age: Ranges, starting from 19~24, ending around 37

race: elven, though from a different region than the Vermudian elves

gender: cis male (if he really thought on it, though, he'd consider himself some degree of apagender)

orientation: gay, demisexual

moral alignment: chaotic good (I thinmk..)

class/subclass: started out as an assassin (DDDA), aligned with warfarer for most of his years as an arisen, but ended as a magick archer/trickster when the left side of his body was burned to the point of being non-functional.

background: Raised in a quiet, distant fishing village for most of his childhood. Once 18, he set sail with his beloved. Upon making their home in Melve, a dragon razed the village shortly after, murdering his beloved and leaving him as that world's Arisen, however unwilling he may have been to the role.

interests/hobbies: fishing and sailing (as a sentimental hobby), bird keeping (lovebirds), and writing (:

languages: a basic understanding of common, but his background is fluency in elven (and it is his preference). He has selective mutism, however, so speaking (with others in general) is often difficult even in his birth language

height: 156 (SHORTTTT)

colors: solid reds, dark purples, and black (:

fruits: fig, passion fruit

alcoholic beverages: Just a solid mead or ale, to take the edge off of whatever state he's in.

smokes: No, it reminds him of his late lover (who was always on greenwarish)

drugs: No

drivers oxcart license: he claims to have one (jumping on the backs of unsuspecting oxen does count right..right..)

ever been arrested: yes.. but he will always deny it (the guards shouldn't have been there) because he is an angel💖

PLAYLIST BECAUSE..ofc🙈: Leonen

PAWN: N'GALAM

nicknames: "little lamb" (by arisen)

age: appears late-twenties

race: Vermudian elven

gender: transgender male (later id's as transmasc)

orientation: aromantic, unlabeled for sexual orientation

moral alignment: chaotic neutral (methinks..)

class/subclass: begins as a warrior, persists as a mage, ends as a sorcerer

background: summoned by his arisen after wandering the Rift for most of his life. Despite their abrasive relationship, they softened eachother for the better. He had initially come to him as a pawn named Angmare, and for the first few years of gaining a conscience (with the arisen's presence) he began to feel uncomfortable, and even sickened by what he was perceived to be. In a possessed fit of rage shortly after contracting dragonsplague, he'd clawed out his own chest and declared himself anew to Leonen (after returning from the rift, that is😭).

interests/hobbies: loveloveLOVES dancing and music, along with stargazing (preferably from inside, though), and making jewelry with the scraps they collect from battle.

languages: common and Vermudian elvish, learned his arisen's dialect later.

height: 203 (I think..🙈)

colors: deep/royal purples, burgundy, black, soft turquoise

fruits: papaya, pineapple

alcoholic beverages: he steals the fruit wines that are wasting away aging in their storage

smokes: noo

drugs: nooo

drivers oxcart license: no (he despises the smell of ox poo... it's worth walking the whole way to him)

ever been arrested: he says they'll never find the bodies (he hasn't)

AWESOME SEXY BEAUTIFUL PLAYLIST: N'galam

thank you for suffering along with my world building that 100% makes sense 🤝

[wing-ed-thing]

Man in Uniform (Erwin x Reader)

Synopsis: After a cut in the budget, your signature is the only thing that stands in the way of the Scout’s funds. Erwin is a selfish bastard, and unfortunately for you, you’re a sucker for a man in uniform.

Word Count: 3.7k

Tags/Warnings: Fem!Reader, Noble!Reader, Fluff, Flirting, Alcohol, 100% self-indulgent 

Notes: This played in my head like a vintage black-and-white movie. I hope it does for you too! I’ve had this sitting in the drafts for about 2 weeks aaaaa

You were a vision coming down those steps. 

The way the people in the room stopped to stare truly felt like a fairy tale. Erwin was no different. He sipped his champagne by the cocktail table that the Scout leadership wordlessly claimed, watching as the subtle train of your gown slinked down the marble stairs with each step of your high heel shoes. Erwin himself could have easily been mistaken for a prince in the Scout’s formal attire, but he seemed to be the last person holding your attention. You bashfully looked off to the side, an attempt to ignore that the entire ballroom seemed to stop for you. 

“A little extra for a charity event, don’t you think?” Levi muttered, staring down at the cup of tea he bullied from the kitchen. Tea and coffee were supposed to be served after dessert, but he found his ways to be persuasive.

“Nobility will do as nobility does.” Erwin took another sip of his drink, eyes glued on you as you were swiftly swarmed by politicians, businessmen, and other nobles. He felt a harsh tug on the back of his dress uniform. 

“You’re not actually going to do it, are you?” Levi pulled at the collar of his shirt. The Scout’s dress uniform— which consisted of a decorated dark olive green blazer and slacks with a complimentary collared shirt and tie— served to be far tighter than the functional field uniform designed for movement. 

“Doesn’t hurt to try.” He adjusted a few pins on his jacket and ran a thumb underneath the thick belt around his waist. He corrected the orientation of the wide collar. “How does my tie look?” Levi gave it a once over before coming around the small table to adjust it. He pulled it extra tight with a scowl.

“You think she’s going to hand you a fat stack of cash because she thinks you’re pretty? Stupidest idea if I've ever heard one. She has the power to take away what little funds we’ve got if she doesn’t get you suspended for harassment first.”

Erwin shrugged.

“Stranger things have happened.” He played with his cufflinks, his attention fully on you. A trio of women Erwin recognized from past events greeted you enthusiastically. “According to my sources, I have a pretty fair shot.” Levi rolled his eyes along with a few choice words.

“At least wait until she’s done the rounds.”

“Doesn’t hurt to be prepared.”

Erwin heeded Levi’s advice, sipping his drink as you made your way around the ballroom. A diplomat had one of your hands in both of his as he shook you violently, which Erwin took as a cue to set down his empty glass. He made his approach. 

He knew you well on paper. A descendent of a noble and respected family, you were the darling of Sina. With your pedigree, you held quite a powerful place in government. The two of you had brief exchanges during your fair share of meetings, important government decisions, and of course, charity events.

He maneuvered through the small group around you, addressing you by name. Your audience parted as Erwin strolled up to you, looking as neat and militant as ever. Inwardly, he chuckled to himself at your dreadful expression. He could see the semblance of it in your otherwise pleasant demeanor. Surely, he looked like yet another official vying for your attention, and you weren’t wrong. 

You offered your hand cordially, and Erwin bowed at the waist to brush his lips against your knuckles. 

“It is a pleasure seeing you.” He rose, your slender fingers still in his. “If I may, you look absolutely radiant tonight.” Your laugh sounded like a sigh as you bobbed your head lightly and withdrew your hand.

“Commander Smith, aren’t you as charming as ever?” Erwin shook his head and touched the front of his uniform. 

“Please, call me Erwin. Smith was my father,” he nodded with a polite smile. Levi rolled his eyes somewhere in the background. Erwin made a show of looking at your company, who tried to keep friendly faces. He focused his attention back on you. “Would you allow me to steal you away?” 

You opened your mouth to deny him but met his bright blue irises as the words died on your lips. They flickered to his right, left, and back at you for the briefest of seconds. You gauged the faces surrounding you as the corners of your lips tugged upward into a gentle smile.

“Certainly.” You giggled nervously, quickly slipping your hand around the crux of his elbow as you allowed him to escort you away. You glanced at a set of open doors, giving Erwin’s sleeve a light tug. “Would you mind if we head toward the balcony? The view of Sina is simply wonderful from up here.” Erwin offered you a slow nod as he gestured.

“Lead the way.” 

You crossed the ballroom, attempting not to appear too hasty as you offered gracious smiles to the important people who made sure to catch your eye. A waiter passed, and you stopped briefly to take two champagne flutes between your knuckles. Erwin raised his thick brows in amusement at the sight but said nothing.

You handed him one quietly as soon as you stepped onto the balcony. Lit by a few lamps, the outdoor area was dark enough and in a position to seclude the two of you without the appearance of hiding away intentionally. The whole of it wrapped around the building. Blooming bushes lined the railing down to a set of stairs to the gardens on your right. You released his arm, moving forward to take in the scenery. People continued to bustle inside. You took a breath. 

“Did I look like I needed rescuing that badly?” you let out another laugh-like sigh. He wondered if you could breathe in that dress. You approached the decorated railing, taking a sip of your drink. The weather was warm tonight.

“Someone once told me that the way Stevens shakes hands looks like he’s trying to make himself a cocktail.” Erwin leaned back against the railing; one arm crossed over his chest. He held his glass in his opposite hand, twirling the stem between his fingers.

“Oh no!” you laughed, cupping your face with a hand as you let your neat demeanor drop for a moment. “Think he should have become a bartender? He’s got a mean shake.” Erwin didn’t answer your rhetorical question as he studied you, taking in everything from your hair to the intricate pattern that graced the bodice of your gown. 

“I’m glad we have the opportunity to chat. I imagined it would be impossible to get a moment alone with you.” You hummed to yourself.

“Something tells me that you don’t just want to shoot the breeze, as they say?” You studied him out of your peripheral. You knew this game well. Like every other person in the ballroom, Erwin wanted to bend your ear to something or another.

“Can I not enjoy the company of a beautiful woman?” He placed one of his elbows back against the carved stone. You stared at the various pins and metals he wore across his chest. The side of your face found your palm as you leaned forward. You enjoyed the whole ensemble if you were honest with yourself. “One’s deprived of such pleasures on the battlefield, you know.” You resisted the urge to scoff.

“You sure are laying it on thick, hm, Commander?” you muttered into the rim of your glass. You took a half step away, more straying in the space than trying to escape.

“Erwin, please,” he corrected gently, gesturing with his glass. “Unless the title pleases you.” Your glance away was all the confirmation he needed. Your shoulders dropped as you huffed. 

“Surely you know—” You frowned. —“You shouldn’t expect to get funding from an attempt to charm me. It won’t work, so please, let’s just enjoy the night.” You trusted that out of all the people who would bother you about work, Erwin was one you could be the most straightforward with. Based on your limited interactions, it was an educated gamble. 

“You think I’m trying to pull a ploy?” He cocked a brow, staring into his drink. You crossed your arms with a single nod of your head. You looked awfully sure of yourself.

“I wouldn’t put it past you, yes.” 

“I’m hurt you would see me in such a light.” Erwin feigned offense which you ignored. You cocked your head to the side haughtily, staring back into the ballroom. Golden light shone onto the balcony from the rich chandeliers on the intricately crafted ceiling.

“On the contrary, I expect nothing different from the Commander of the Scouts.”

“And yet you’ve allowed me an audience with you.” Erwin pushed off from where he leaned, circling you slowly. He stopped in front of you. The glow from the chandeliers inside outlined him in a warm gleam. “Alone. Away from everyone else.” You almost frowned at the suggestion but forced yourself to maintain your cordial demeanor. You tightened your posture.

“Too much hollow chatter for me,” was your excuse. “At least with your presence, many others who seek things from me will surely leave me alone.” You nodded to yourself, convinced of your justification.

“You find me intimidating?” Erwin clasped his hands behind his back, surely a purposeful display. You tried your best to appear unimpressed. He cocked his head to the side. 

“Some are under the impression that the Scouts are audacious. That with humanity’s strength comes… conceited self-assurance.” You shrugged daintily. You took a long sip of your drink, letting the tiny bubbles pop down your throat. “Perhaps you intimidate someone else. Not me.”

“Audacity and strength,” he cherry-picked in consideration, clearly entertained. His peering eyes searched your face for a response. “Do you not think so?” His real question crept within the subtext.

“I keep my politics close to my chest.” 

“Less politics and more of an opinion.” His retort was quick and held a hint of harshness. You couldn’t help the acute look of surprise as you warily narrowed your eyes at him. He could practically see you choose your words. 

“You certainly are brazen, Commander Erwin.” Your heels clicked against the tile below. His gaze followed you as you drifted. “I never knew the Scouts were so guarded of their reputation.”

“Ah, so the title does please you.” He lit up in amusement as bashfulness burned under your skin. “I’ll have you know that the reputation of the Scouts is a reflection of her leadership.” You locked eyes, and you didn’t miss a beat. 

“So it is ego, hm?”

Inside, the hired collection of instrumentalists played a romantic song. Famous in Sina, you recognized it right away. It almost made you wish you were back inside, but another stray consideration of the people you would have to talk to made you refrain from such thoughts. By the time you snapped from your distraction, Erwin had already put his glass down on the stone railing as he outstretched his hand to you. 

“May I?” The music swelled in the background. 

You gave him an almost exasperated look, but not wanting to waste a good song, you placed your drink beside his and took his hand.

Erwin Smith was much more proficient in dance than you had anticipated. You draped one arm over his shoulder, and with your other hand in his, Erwin led your dance around the balcony in perfect time with the music. The slow and intricate waltz was another signature of the innermost wall. You learned it as a child, as did all children of Sina— poor and rich. You wondered where Erwin learned it.

Clearly, he was trying to pander to you.

“I thought I made myself perfectly clear that your charm will not get your branch the funding you desire,” you said quietly, careful not to miss a step in the dance. You looked up at Erwin, who didn’t appear to be listening. You continued more forcefully. “Everyone’s budget was slashed, not just the Scouts. Things have been very tight. It wouldn’t be fair—”

“Believe me; I’m not trying to seduce you in any sense of the word.” Erwin manipulated you into a twirl, catching you and pulling you into his chest as you tripped on your heels. “Although, it’s reassuring to hear that you think I’m charming.”

“Don’t you go around throwing out words like that. Someone will overhear and get the wrong idea.” You composed yourself quickly, retreating from Erwin’s embrace a slight distance as you continued your movement to the music.

“There’s no one around to hear anything, my dear.” You scowled disapprovingly, your footwork not faltering for a moment. 

“Being slapped around by Titans has surely made a few screws rattle loose in that brain of yours,” you jeered. The vibrations of Erwin’s laugh reverberated from his chest through yours. He stared down at you, brows slightly raised.

“Do Titans terrify you?” “Of course,” you puffed in annoyance. “You likely have reason to fear them more than I do.” Amusement and self-assuredness radiated from Erwin in waves. 

“Have you ever seen one?”

“Don’t patronize me.”

“I wouldn’t dare.” 

Erwin’s slight grin melted slowly from his face. You watched it intently, wondering what he was thinking about at the mere mention of Titans. You softened in his grip. Your words were true; Erwin likely had more reason to fear the giants that roamed outside the walls. He had seen them. Fought them. The moment of acute vulnerability passed quicker than a shadow. 

“I’m curious to know what you’ve heard.” His voice sounded low and gentle. “From a political figure such as yourself who grew up in Sina.” You paused, not quite understanding the goal of his question. The music changed inside, and wordlessly, so did your dance.

“That there are giants outside. Man-eating ones.” Naivety coated your words. Your body moved in tandem with Erwin’s. He held you in his striking irises, listening. You smoothed your hands over the firm, thick material of his blazer. “I heard they grow up to ten meters tall.”

“Some are fifteen.”

“Really?” One of your legs rose gracefully off the ground as Erwin dipped you low. You caught sight of the garden through the gaps in the balcony’s siding. “How horrifying.”

“I’ve seen dozens,” Erwin said, no louder than a whisper. You assumed an upward position as you continued the waltz. The side of his lips brushed up against the side of your temple. You held onto the low timber of his voice. “Ridden into the field just to see young soldiers eaten alive.”

“Does that weigh on you?”

“It does.” You felt him nod against you. A few strands of your hair came out of its updo, not that you minded. “You need not worry about such things.” You frowned as you were spun. Erwin’s hard chest met your back. Your hands were still in his, one pinned to your waist while the other floated in the air adjacent to your shoulder. 

“Because I am from Sina?” You bowed your head the slightest bit as you felt his warm breath on the shell of your ear. The dimness of the balcony only made the traditional dance feel more intimate. More intimate than it should have been between two government officials. “You think I don’t have to worry? I have lives in my hands just as you.” 

“Of course not; you misunderstand me.”

Erwin twirled you slowly and gracefully back around. You held him at arm’s length, connected only by intertwining fingers. He tsked, shaking his head as he pulled you back.

 “It’s my job to worry about the Titans. Put your trust in me. I assure you—” Your palm rested on the layered fabric at the back of Erwin’s neck. His lips brushed the skin of your cheek as his voice dropped low. “I’ll protect you from the monsters.” 

Your breath hitched in your throat as you came to a complete stop. Your voice stalled in your throat as words dissolved on your tongue. 

You pulled away from Erwin completely, taking a few steps back. You clutched parts of your skirt in your clammy palms as reality— the reason Erwin had sought your time in the first place— quickly set in. He stood, hands again behind his back, as he awaited your response. You coiled your arms over your chest.

“You’re full of shit—”

“Quite the mouth on you, my lady.” His forehead wrinkled in amusement. “Is this how nobility is brought up?” Erwin closed the gap between you in just two broad steps. You bumped into the stone railing, knocking at least one of your champagne flutes into the flowers as he did little more than cage you in.

You couldn’t help the way your eyes widened.

“What do you think you’re doing?” You nearly gasped, a nervous shiver freezing you where you stood. The warm lantern light sparkled off your eyes. “Commander… Erwin…?” He corralled a few pieces of hair behind your ear, tracing your jaw until his fingers reached your chin.

“Rest assured; I am more than capable of keeping a foul-mouthed princess like yourself safe. Do you not think so?” You remained completely still, and as he moved his head forward. He tilted your chin up, and your lashes fluttered closed. 

But the kiss you anticipated never came. 

You opened your eyes to see Erwin looking about the same as he did all night: thick brows raised and the corners of his lips curving into a subtle, almost boyish smile. His touch left your face as he quirked an eyebrow.

“Yes, my lady?”

You gasped in horror, the shock quickly melting into outraged embarrassment. You sputtered, and when your words wouldn’t come out, you shoved his chest hard. 

“Erwin!” He stumbled back as you stormed away. “You despicable man!” He called after you as you hurried down the garden steps, completely mortified with yourself. The laugh in his voice made you just about boil. Erwin caught your wrist on the first landing. You spun around in rage.

“I apologize for my forwardness. It was all in jest.”

“If this is your strategy for winning over a lady, I weep for the future of the Scouting Regiment.” You delivered a swift slap across Erwin’s face. Caught off guard at the force, Erwin released you and staggered back. You covered your mouth, the weight of what you had just done crashing down on you all at once. 

A few strands of his bangs fell into his face. He tenderly poked at the skin of his cheek as he flexed his jaw; a certain amount of awe was written on his irises. Much to your surprise, his disposition was completely void of defensiveness or anger. If you didn’t know any better, you would say that Erwin looked pretty damn impressed. 

He let out a single satisfied snort and a resigned sigh. His fingers raked through his undercut as he seemed to ponder to himself.

“I apologize for offending you. That was very unprofessional of me. I hope we’re even now.” He offered you a contrite look. “I do not wish you to feel further discomfort, so I will take my leave.” Erwin gave a slight bow of his head before turning to walk back up the stairs. “It was a pleasure having a conversation with you.” 

You watched him as he went, emotions swirling around inside of you. You took a step forward; an arm outstretched in front of you. You recoiled somewhat, unsure of yourself. 

A moment passed. Other guests seemed to have also stumbled upon the balcony’s availability. Their meandering shadows moved in front of Erwin, just about where the two of you had been. You froze at the sight of what looked to be Stevens’ silhouette cast by the lamplight on the side of the building. 

You cleared your throat, squaring your shoulders to recall your diplomatic appearance.

“Uh… Commander Erwin…!” you called. He stopped mid-stride with one boot settled on the elevated step above and the other on the stair below. Erwin looked over his shoulder, standing sideways on the steps. 

“Yes?”

You cleared your throat again, smoothing out the front of your dress. 

“I would not be opposed to a walk in the garden.” Erwin glanced out into the extensive gardens, then back to you with a few bobs of his head.

“Ah, yes. That sounds like a wonderful way to spend the night. I do wish you a wonderful stroll.” He took a few more steps back up toward the balcony. You scurried up a few yourself, clutching your skirt as you called after him again. 

“E-... Erwin…?” He stopped again. You glanced off to the side. You played with the lace in your hands. “I more meant that I wouldn’t mind if you accompanied me.” Erwin adjusted his collar with a shrug. You resisted a glare. You knew very well what he wanted you to say.

“I couldn’t possibly intrude. After my distasteful joke, I couldn’t possibly—”

“Get over here and escort me through the gardens, and I’ll revisit your stupid little funding proposal!” you huffed. Erwin snickered at the little stomp of your foot. You witnessed another satisfied raise of his eyebrows. You had a mind to pay more attention to those than his actual words.

“Very well, if I am being commanded to do so. Who am I to refuse?” He descended quickly, and you took him by the arm as you entered the gardens. Other guests seemed to follow your lead as they chatted casually with each other. To anyone else, it would appear that you and Erwin came out with the crowd rather than hiding away.

“Look at them.” You stared up at the balcony full of people with a scowl. You faced him with a pout. “Vultures, the lot of them. You may be insufferable, but at least I can stand you.” Erwin didn’t protest as you tugged him along.

“So much for your closely-held politics.”

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Notes: What’s reader’s title? God if I know. I see Erwin very capable of walking the line of guilt and manipulation to get what he wants. Don’t they say the best lies have truth in them? He’s so dynamic and I feel like he’s a master code-switcher